Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Wow! What a day. My prayer's were answered! I feel so fortunate. Grandma F. is up and walking after her surgery. Her Pneumonia is subsiding. My husband got a job. I have so much to be thankful for. My son is about to walk any day now. He stands all alone and pops up and down while standing alone. He frequently takes steps unassisted.
Depression is very serious. I had no idea what it was all about until two years ago. I only understood it's definition. There is a list of events in Psychology that a person can go through in life that can lead a person into depression. In the top five of that list, is the loss of a job. My husband lost his almost three years ago. During the time immediately following his unemployment, he began to fall away into a realm where I was not allowed. I had no idea what he was thinking or going through. I was the optimistic type person. We were newlyweds and I refused to accept that there maybe something wrong. Growing being told to not show emotion, I continued the behavior without hesitation. Shame on me. It was not this last year, I began to understand what demon he was fighting, and what one I was ignoring. His job had come to be a great deal of importance to him. He was paid well and we lived well. We began somewhat of a nomadiac lifestyle after that. We moved in with his family at their home. We had our own space but not income. We were expecting our son, our first child. We had gotten in over our heads financially trying to stay afloat. I thought life could not get anyworse. We wanted to be happy for the upcoming birth of our son, but we were so consumed with our situation. We decided to try and recover. He could not get a job. I would be ending the days that I could work, shortly. This is just the surface on which I hope to write much more in depth about. Anyway as you read this you can see why I have so much to be thankful. After almost three years of despair there is light at the end of the tunnel. If it had not been for the birth of our son and loving bond we share I am not sure where I would be standing today.


Anonymous Stefan said...

It's amazing how love can get you through the toughest situations. I know how hard the battle with depression can be, but with your love, you guys can make it through anything. I'm happy for you guys and wish the best for your family.

8:14 PM  

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